I suppose I should put a small update here on the social welfare thing. Well the problem is... it was very scary, I did my best not to be too pooped about seven other people talking about me, I forgot about party hats altogether, BUT. There wasn't really a big solution. Yet. People were going to do research and stuff, and after a month we'd have YET ANOTHER meeting where I could think of party hats YET AGAIN and endure a sleepless night YET AGAIN. Other people were quite positive about the whole thing, saying that hey! social welfare admitted certain wrongs, were looking for better methods... but I just thought, man, there was no instant solution. Blah. This sure makes for a vague blog entry. (thankfully I didn't say this to the people there) So... the 3500 euro has not been poofed away yet, and this story is to be continued. That's all folks. At least for now.
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It’s what my dad tells me sometimes. You know, he asks me something or gives a lengthy explanation, and when I ask for repetition of a certain part, he tells me to “Oh, just forget it.” It’s nice when people ask you to do something you’re good at. In recent days I’ve forgotten to tell the relevant people about this incredibly important letter that I’d received. Now I’ve forgotten where this letter is. Or another instance: in a meeting, I forgot that something special that I was saying had actually just been said about ten minutes before. Oops. The problem comes, when you forget that you’re supposed to forget. And you use all your memory helps, to try and do something you’re not good at.
God also tells me to forget sometimes. Nice huh. “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?” I thought of this part in the Bible yesterday morning at six or so, when stressed-out me was worrying about the meeting at social welfare. Formerly, I probably would have been better able to have these kinds of meetings. Formerly, I probably wouldn’t have written a book about myself with problems. It’s good to forget this, because it’s not so relevant now. Except… I sometimes forget that I’m supposed to forget :) Man, life is tough sometimes. For those who saw it on facebook - my Christmas potatoes burned to a black crisp in the new oven. Maybe an hour into the new year, I found myself teetering alone in the darkness outside, wondering how I was ever going to get in by myself. I almost fell in the kitchen, and I slept more than two hours at someone's place I was visiting. The most recent drama: social welfare has written, demanding 3500 euro from me, because I was supposed to have earned this with the book. A 'small' misunderstanding, leaving me with the responsibility of fixing the mess... Concerning the latter. As I'm sure you can imagine, this has given quite the stress. Part of me thinks, "There is absolutely no reason for this, I can make it totally clear, what are they thinking?!" and part of me thinks "My dream of studying and traveling crumbled, now social welfare is crumbling my new dream!" Leaving me to groan, "Help God, help!" One of THE most amazing helps in this whole thing has been the ombudsman (English?), actually an ombudsvrouw. Who has enabled the 3500 euro not to have to be paid, and who has also asked for a 'talk' with social welfare. On Thursday morning. It'll be at least seven of us in the room, having this 'talk', all concerning me and this problematic thing I unfortunately wrote. I have been SO nervous and weepy! Then today, when writing a checklist of important stuff to bring on Thursday, I all of a sudden happened to think of my Winnie-the-Pooh party hats. And all these seven people sitting around the table looking serious and scary, wearing... Winnie-the-Pooh party hats. Behind a cupcake with a little candle, with their mouths full of marshmallow, holding a balloon, you get the picture. Ah, I cracked up and the nervousness has left. It'll be o.k.! God has helped in the preparations for this talk, He has helped in my inner nervousness, He'll be there on Thursday! Right in the middle of all those people wearing (imaginary) party hats. Ha. |
Mattanja OosterhuisHaving grown up in diverse places on earth, I suppose I've learned to make the best of what comes my way. Such as a hemorrhage. After this bleeding in my head occurred in dec. 2010, my life has come to look different. On my blog I write about some of this. Archives
March 2018
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